If all goes according to plan, in six day’s time, I will be flying over the Atlantic Ocean on my way to Finland.
I am not sad to leave. I do not feel bound to the people or places here. I love the people and places here, but I do not feel that I need to be by them. I feel that my love for them will be the same regardless of where we are, and I believe this gives me the courage to leave them. I estimate that the only reason I would miss them is if my brain was not being stimulated in the way that these people stimulate it, or if I was lonely. I will have to make some new friends over there to combat these things.
I am not scared of going to Finland. I know that the things that happen here will happen over there as well. For example, everything will still be composed of atoms and people will still get upset if you punch them. There will be some discrepancies to be sure, especially in areas such as culture, but I will not have to completely rework my understanding of the world in order to function. I feel like a sort of peaceful investigator: interested in everything, sure of myself and what I know, and happy to go at my own pace. I’m happy to be expanding what I know.
In light of my trip to Finland, everything around here suddenly has perspective. This used to be my whole world; now my world is about to get bigger. Thinking about that makes this place seem smaller. Still great, but smaller in terms of the big picture. For example, my house here is my home, but now I know that it’s also just a house. I feel that way with many things.
I believe that I am mentally and emotionally ready for this trip to begin.